Where
Things Work RightWhere
Things Work Right
** New ideas added 03/01/05 starting at number 163.
163. Galactic Time Distortion Map -
Replace the stars with the boundaries of time distortion fields.
This would be a hard map to make but an interesting one to view.
Instead of seeing the stars in our galaxy it would
show how time is distorted around each of the bodies in it. For instance,
starting with earth as green since that would
be the subjective viewpoint of the observer, any black holes at the center
of the galaxy would be bright red from the
center out to their event horizon since time would look like it was stopped
inside that ring to the earth-bound
observer. Moving out from the event horizon the color would gradually
change from red to orange to yellow to green
(once it reached the point where one minute on earth looked like one minute
in space). Other large bodies in the
galaxy wouldn't start with red since they don't have an event horizon,
but they might start with an orange or yellow
ring if they're massive enough to distort time.
So, what would make this an interesting map? For one thing, it would
show where time distortion rings overlapped
and raise the question of what the equivalent of a Lagrange point would
be when we're talking about time instead of
gravity. It might also provoke some theories about why the Pioneer
spacecraft aren't where they're supposed to be
even after all of the gravitational influences have been taken into account.
164. Table Gutters -
Saving your clothes one meal at a time.
During a recent trip to a restaurant one of the people dining with us knocked
over his glass, sending the coke flowing
over half of the table and down into a puddle on the floor. While
waiting for someone to clean it up it occurred to me
that we wouldn't have all had to jump back out of the way to keep from
getting soaked if the table had had a discreet
gutter system built into it. A table like that would have rounded
edges that had about a one inch gap halfway down
the curve. All four gutters would be slightly angled towards one
corner pocket which had a flat plastic bottle attached
to it beneath the table. To clean up, all you'd have to do is run
a towel down each gutter to force any remaining fluid
into the bottle, unhook the used bottle, and snap in a replacement bottle.
It might take a few more seconds after each
meal for the busboy to run a towel down the gutters to clean them between
meals but it would save the diners a lot of
embarrassment and put those who brought children with them a little more
at ease. It might also save the restaurant
some money from slip-and-fall lawsuits too.
165. Who the Hell Are You Again -
Let your phone figure it out.
This new phone feature would come in handy when a caller's voice doesn't
give you a clue about their identity but
who still seem to know you. It would let you record a snippet of conversation
and then attach a name to that snippet
after the conversation is over. That way the next time they call you could
hit an ID key so your phone could match the
voice with the recordings and display the caller's name (or whisper it
into your ear through the earpiece if you went for
the more hi-tech version.)
166. Smart Luggage -
Simple idea - you land at your destination, dial a phone number, and an
automated voice says either 'Your luggage is
here,' or, 'Hey, I'm in Cleveland. Please don't leave me here.' Now
that most airports have wi-fi hotspots this
wouldn't be too hard to turn into a reality.
A small padlock that contained a couple of extra features could do the
trick. When locked onto the handle of a
suitcase or garment bag it would start actively searching for a wi-fi hotspot
every 15-30 minutes. If one was found it
would send it's location and unique ID to the company that put this idea
into practice. As soon as you landed you'd
dial that company, key in the unique number and get one of the two messages
shown above (with the relevant city
substituted of course). The company could determine if you were in the
same city as your luggage based on your cell
phone location, which can easily be pinpointed to within 50 feet of its
true location (something for cheating spouses to
keep in mind if they bring their cell phone along with them).
A few more details. The hook on the padlock would have an antenna embedded
in it. The padlock would also come
with an adapter so it could be recharged as needed. It might be nice to
have a beeper too, like those on cars that go
off when you press a remote, so you could pick it out of a pile by pressing
the remote that came with it. (This might
have to be set up so individualized ringtones could be downloaded to the
padlock to make it easier to tell your
luggage apart from those of other people pushing their remotes. For instance,
the sound of a duck quacking would be
hard to miss.)
167. Saved Seat Flag -
Is that seat taken, is that seat taken, is that seat taken...
This idea would keep you from having to ask that question over and over
again in a crowded theater when you're
looking for an available seat, and also keep you from having to answer
it over and over again when you're saving a
seat for someone. The way it is now, people usually put a jacket,
pocketbook, ticket stub or something along those
lines in the seat they want to save. The problem with these things
is that you have to get pretty close before you see
them (if you see them at all), wasting your time when you're trying to
find a seat.
The 'saved seat flag' would fix that. Each seat would have a small,
thin vertical tube attached to the front of its
armrest. When you pulled a tab on its top a pole about 18" high would
come up out of it. Once free from the
confining tube a hinged flag would drop down, displaying a flag that clearly
said 'RESERVED'. To put the pole back
into its tube you'd just press in a tab at the bottom that was resting
on the lip of tube (this would also make it easy for
ushers to put them back in place in between shows too if kids had pulled
them a bunch of them up on their way out
as a prank).
168. Re-Map the World -
Let's just assume the water rose.
If you look at a current map of the world you can see that we've built
towns and cities near almost every sheltered
harbor and river delta. This seems to be part of our nature as a species.
That being the case, it would be interesting
to use some of the underwater megaliths that have been discovered as markers
showing historical sea levels, redraw
the world map based on those sea levels, and then send submersibles searching
for ruins where harbors and river
deltas used to be. This makes more sense than assuming every underwater
megalith is the fabled sunken city of
Atlantis. See the link for one example of such a marker.
169. Right-handed Races -
Taking advantage of handedness to set new records.
People who bet on horses have recently begun to take handedness (which
the horses have) into account when
placing their bets because it's been shown to have an impact on how they
perform on different tracks. Since most
human track events are run on racetracks in a counterclockwise direction
it would be interested to run a few
clockwise to see if taking advantage of our handedness would set new records.
170. Holographic Scarecrow -
Put a little life into your scarecrow.
Mounted on a large weather vane in a field, the holographic image of a
scarecrow would move wherever the wind
moved it, making it a more lifelike threat to crows.
171. Hopping Horseshoes -
Making bucking broncos more productive.
At some point a bucking bronco looses it's ommph and has to be retired
from the rodeo circuit. Since that retirement
is unlikely to be a pleasant one, providing them with an advanced pair
of horseshoes would let them put it off longer.
Modified hooves using a design similiar to the used in the Kangaroo Jump
shoes (shown in the link) would give them
more buck and extend their time in the game. The new hooves would have
to have extensions added to brace their
lower legs against the shock but that's doable.
172. Accelerate My Bookmarks -
I know there are already accelerators out there that will download all
of the links on a web page while you're reading
the page to speed up the process when you click on a link. Another accelerator
feature would also be useful. The
browser, when opened, could automatically download all of the links listed
in your bookmarks (favorites list) once
you've set a default telling it to do so. That way whenever you clicked
on a bookmark the page would already be
there.
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